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_92.webp "A married man says he became “obsessed” with another woman after meeting her at a course - but his wife has since forgiven him after realising it “wasn’t his fault”.<br/><br/>Ruth Perl, 58, and her husband David, 64, have spent 13 years recovering from the incident.<br/><br/>David never acted on his feelings towards the person he fancied - but he chose to tell the woman after confiding in Ruth.<br/><br/>He started researching an emotional experience known as ‘limerence’ - which means intrusive, romantic thoughts about another person. <br/><br/>David realised his feelings were unwanted - he had no control over them and wasn't interested in beginning an affair with the woman. <br/><br/>After telling Ruth about his realisation, the couple spent time rebuilding their relationship - and say they’re happier than ever.<br/><br/>David, a couples’ therapist from St. Albans, Herts., said: “It wasn’t a normal crush, it was weird and disturbing - but we’ve put in the years to heal ourselves since.<br/><br/>“It was a difficult one - I did end up telling the other person, as I was encouraged to do so through therapy.<br/><br/>“I think she was horrified - in hindsight, it was really unfair to put that on her.<br/><br/>“But it’s all about forgiveness, we’ve done the work and are happier than ever.”<br/><br/>David met the woman he developed feelings for on January 14, 2011 - after chatting to her at a training course.<br/><br/>Their conversation lasted less than 20 minutes, but David could feel he was “besotted” by her - without being able to put a finger on why.<br/><br/>“I’ve had crushes before,” he added. “We both have. But nothing like this - this was really unusual.”<br/><br/>David thought about her, night-and-day, for weeks.<br/><br/>He looked online at forums about “obsessive love” - and came across a post about limerence.<br/><br/>He said: “I thought, 'jeez, this is what I’ve got to a T.'<br/><br/>“Something’s not right - I was absolutely obsessed and I only spoke to her for 20 minutes.<br/><br/>“I kept going over every single word she said to me, every little action.<br/><br/>“The moment I’d wake up, I’d rehearse in my head what I might say to her if she came up to talk to me.<br/><br/>“I’d experience soaring highs if she replied to an email - and extreme lows if she didn’t.<br/><br/>“It was like an intermittent reward.”<br/><br/>Knowing the feeling wasn’t going to go away any time soon, he decided to tell Ruth - who also works as a couples’ therapist.<br/><br/>She said: “David told me, and this was all going on about five days after my dad’s funeral.<br/><br/>“I was in horrific grief at the time, and so my first thoughts were: ‘Oh, for god’s sake. How can you be so bloody stupid?’<br/><br/>“My dad had just died, and my husband wanted to p*ss off into fantasy land.<br/><br/>“We went into freefall, and it was a very, very difficult 12 months.”<br/><br/>After choosing to concentrate on grieving for her dad for a year, Ruth says she “finally had the brain capacity” to sit down with David, and ask him what was going on.<br/><br/>He hadn’t acted on his feelings - and actively decided he wouldn’t “consummate” the crush.<br/><br/>“David reached out to me,” Ruth said. “He asked me, ‘please help me understand what’s going on.’<br/><br/>“He was so confused. I asked him if he still wanted to be married, and he said, ‘I don’t want to throw away what we’ve got.’<br/><br/>“I told him to sit in the confusion, and I’d do what I could to support him.<br/><br/>“But I knew that what will be will be, we might not necessarily make it out of this.”<br/><br/>David said: “We started having marriage counselling - and one thing I want to stress is it isn’t an excuse to cheat.<br/><br/>“I was responsible for what I did - but it did make me realise that often, people don’t set out to have an affair.”<br/><br/>David explored some of the ways therapists encourage people to “heal” from limerence - including starving themselves from contact, or consummating it with the other person.<br/><br/>He settled on going to therapy, and letting the woman know he couldn’t speak to her anymore.<br/><br/>Now, David and Ruth help other couples going through the same thing - and have taught their children, Hannah-Mai, 32, and Isobel, 29, how to value their own relationships.<br/><br/>Ruth said: “It was important our two daughters knew about all this.<br/><br/>“They were older teenagers when this was all going on, and they understood it.<br/><br/>“We thought it was very important for them to understand that all marriages have differences - but you don’t throw the towel in when the going gets tough.<br/><br/>“Even when you’re talking about a full-blown physical affair. Once is a mistake, twice is a habit.”")
_poor-fat-woman.webp "Olusegun Zaccheaus")
_oga-landlord-124124-fr0m-frying-pan-to-freezer.webp "OfficialNeduTV")
_bersatu-man-reprimands-pas-info-chief-for-touching-on-vernacular-schools.webp "The party’s associate wing chairman Chong Fat Full says Ahmad Fadhli Shaari’s act of highlighting DAP candidate Pang Sock Tao’s educational background was an attempt to discriminate against her.<br/><br/><br/>Read More: https://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/category/nation/2024/04/30/bersatu-man-reprimands-pas-info-chief-for-touching-on-vernacular-schools/<br/><br/>Laporan Lanjut: https://www.freemalaysiatoday.com/category/bahasa/tempatan/2024/04/30/henti-main-isu-sekolah-vernakular-sayap-bersekutu-bersatu-tegur-fadhli/<br/><br/>Free Malaysia Today is an independent, bi-lingual news portal with a focus on Malaysian current affairs.<br/><br/>Subscribe to our channel - http://bit.ly/2Qo08ry<br/>------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<br/>Check us out at https://www.freemalaysiatoday.com<br/>Follow FMT on Facebook: https://bit.ly/49JJoo5<br/>Follow FMT on Dailymotion: https://bit.ly/2WGITHM<br/>Follow FMT on X: https://bit.ly/48zARSW <br/>Follow FMT on Instagram: https://bit.ly/48Cq76h<br/>Follow FMT on TikTok : https://bit.ly/3uKuQFp<br/>Follow FMT Berita on TikTok: https://bit.ly/48vpnQG <br/>Follow FMT Telegram - https://bit.ly/42VyzMX<br/>Follow FMT LinkedIn - https://bit.ly/42YytEb<br/>Follow FMT Lifestyle on Instagram: https://bit.ly/42WrsUj<br/>Follow FMT on WhatsApp: https://bit.ly/49GMbxW <br/>------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<br/>Download FMT News App:<br/>Google Play – http://bit.ly/2YSuV46<br/>App Store – https://apple.co/2HNH7gZ<br/>Huawei AppGallery - https://bit.ly/2D2OpNP<br/><br/>#FMTNews #AhmadFadhliShaari #ChongFatFull #Bersatu #PAS #VernacularSchool")
_mind-blowing-informations-about-fat-girl-124-must-watch.webp "Honest Psychology")
_3-psychology-facts-about-fat-women-scary-thin.webp "Psycho 1.7M")
_baseball-bat-breaks-as-woman-hits-shot.webp "While this high school softball player was training, she broke the bat while hitting a shot. She had hit the ball so hard that the bat broke into two halves, leaving the woman with pride.")
_belly-dance-by-rakhi-singh-india-exclusive-music-video-2021.webp "Yassir Jamal")
_whitney39s-shower-woes-124-my-big-fat-fabulous-life.webp "TLC")
_woman-almost-misses-flight-home-after-waiting-four-hours-to-get-through-security.webp "A woman has described chaotic scenes at a UK airport - which saw her waiting more than FOUR hours to get through security. <br/><br/>Lucy Kenneally, 23, was flying back home to Newcastle, Northern Ireland, with her boyfriend Matthew, 24, after spending the weekend at Silverstone.<br/><br/>The pair arrived at Birmingham Airport at 6.10am - two hours ahead of their 8.40am flight to Belfast International.<br/><br/>Lucy claims the airport app said it would take '0-15 minutes' to get through security but when she arrived there was \")
_124124ritu39s-corner.webp "ritu's corner")
_mohini-4-124-full-movie-124-bengali-short-film-124-bengali-web-series-124-full-hd-124-masslikeus-pictures.webp "Masslikeus Pictures")
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